Even though Glinda was supposedly the "good witch" in
The Wizard of Oz, I always thought she was a real A-hole for not telling Dorothy that she'd had the power to get herself back to Kansas all along. Instead, Glinda's lips remained zipped as she watched Dorothy face obstacles while following the occasionally unforgiving yellow brick road.
And even though Glinda eventually explained to Dorothy that she never would have believed it if she were told right away that she'd had the power to get back to Auntie Em and Uncle Henry, I never understood why she had to face an evil witch, flying monkeys, etc. during her journey to the Emerald City.
That is, I never understood until I reflected upon my own path down my own occasionally unforgiving yellow brick road. I truly believe that facing my own versions of evil witches and flying monkeys over the years has helped steer me in the right direction, and has kept me on the path I was intended to follow all along.
As you may have noticed, I've sprinkled hints throughout my last few blog posts regarding a big life change in the works. Well, it's true! I'm getting out of my terrible, horrible, miserable job in Corporate America to pursue my personal training certification. Promoting health and fitness is my number one priority and passion, so why not also make it my livelihood? As my Dad says, "When you love your job, then you never have to go to work." I like that philosophy. A lot.
And although I've found myself wondering, "Why didn't I do this sooner?," I believe that every experience up to this point - good and bad - has led me exactly to where I needed to be in order to ultimately make this new career decision. Approximately zero of my friends were shocked when I revealed my new plan, because they've felt that this is what I should have been doing all along. But, like Dorothy, I needed to figure it out on my own.
Incidentally, during my perpetual quest for "somewhere over the rainbow," I've realized that an office on the 30th floor of a skyscraper may seem glamorous, but it's no place like home (or, the gym, in my case). By finally listening to my instincts, I've come to terms with the fact that I'll never be happy in an office setting. I've also recognized that I've been ignoring my gut for years because I simply couldn't imagine a world outside the realm of paid health insurance and a traditional 8am - 5pm work day. But by surrendering previous perceptions, and choosing to be open to more possibilities, I've allowed my nagging gut to have its say, making my head finally realize what my heart already knew.
However, although getting certified is not as expensive as obtaining another degree, it's pricey enough to where I had to fully contemplate the commitment to invest myself. And prior to ordering my personal training study materials, my mind was spewing forth doubts and what ifs. But because I've taken for granted the security of my current occupation for too long, it wasn't until that security was compromised that I was ultimately propelled to take the plunge.
It just so happened, that a few weeks ago, at the peak of indecisive thoughts chaotically swirling around in my brain like a Kansas-style twister, I was called into my supervisor's office to learn (well, to confirm my suspicions) that my company is in the process of being sold, and that I should probably start looking for another job. Okay, then. If a green light was what I was waiting for, then I certainly got it in that moment. In fact, it wasn't unlike years of casually expressing the desire to skydive, and then suddenly being pushed out of a plane.
But who knows how long I would have remained comfortable and hesitated to make a change had life not pushed me out of a proverbial plane at that moment? Also, while I should probably be much more stressed out about my situation, I've actually never been happier. I'm discovering that perhaps "uncertainty" doesn't have to be feared. That maybe uncertainty can feel liberating sometimes. In fact, I no longer feel "stuck," or "trapped," which is how I've described feeling for so long. Of course, I'm nervous, excited, overwhelmed, and experiencing all of those other emotions associated with change, but I'm
ready for it. And I doubt I'd feel so ready had the frustrations and low points of my past not worked to strengthen me, thus making me less fearful of pursuing change and overcoming challenges.
I'm fully aware that there is no guarantee I'll be successful in my new venture, but the very definition of faith is "believing without seeing," and isn't a tremendous amount of faith required when pursuing any dream? No matter what, I know in my heart of hearts that this is what I
have to do. What I
want to do. What I
will do.
Finally, like Dorothy, the biggest lesson I've learned from following the yellow brick road thus far is that, "If I ever go looking for my heart's desire again, I won't look any further than my own back yard. Because if it isn't there, I never really lost it to begin with."
