Fuuuuuucccckkkk yeeeeaaahhh! I 'm an Alpha Female Bad Ass! Wooooo!!!
*Clears throat* Pardon me for completely forgetting who I was for a while. For too long of a while. Life tried to drown me in an icy pool of self-pity this winter, and even though I'd come up for a big gulp of air every once in a while, I would quickly find myself back under water.
Allowing myself to drown in self pity is not me though. I mean, I've gone through enough struggles in my life, but I usually pull myself up and out quickly with graceful determination.
My wonderful Aunt Denise tagged me in an article on Facebook today listing the characteristics of an "Alpha Female Bad Ass." Hell yeah! My whole life I've been an independent, strong-willed fighter, and yet this winter I lost that sense of self.
Well, winter is fucking over. This past month I saddled up my big girl boot straps (errr, however the saying goes) and got to work reigniting my passion for my profession and working hard to stop any "victim mentality" tendencies that threatened to overtake me.
I obtained some new clients at work who are focused and ready to work because they have real goals to reach, and they are counting on me to kick their butts and hold them accountable - a responsibility I do not take lightly. I also worked hard to get a few past clients back into the gym and inspired them to set some real goals for themselves. It motivates me to motivate them, and I am excited to be good and busy again at work.
I also have a new manager at work who is female. Her gender is important to note because I was a bit skeptical prior to meeting her after the worst boss I've ever had in the past was female. But my new manager has squashed all my fears and has brought a new, positive energy to my work environment. In fact, I was a bit taken aback last week when I was reading a fitness article and she just sat down next to me to chat about my experience with the company and my goals for the future. She also asks me for my input and values my opinion. I've never really experienced that before, but it has reminded me that after pushing aside all my insecurities, I can look in the mirror and see a confident woman who takes her profession very seriously.
And just today, another trainer who is new to the business but not much younger than me, came to me with tears in her eyes asking for advice on how to be more organized. I empathized because I know exactly how it feels to be overwhelmed when dealing with a new career, and sharing my experience with her along with what works for me reminded me that I am fully capable of being a leader despite my introverted personality.
During the first few months after moving to Chicago 13 years ago, I was incredibly poor and was having difficulty getting my old life in Ohio transferred to my new life in the big city. I was frustrated beyond belief dealing with real, actual, adult responsibilities for the first time in my life. My Dad, back in Ohio and somewhat unsympathetic to my situation, sent a note containing no more than $2, which he specified was to be put toward an "ice cream cone." I was definitely hoping to see a $50 bill in that note, but instead he wrote, "There will always be some problems, but that's life. Welcome to the real world." He was right. As a result, I did not choose to lay down and die. I worked my ass off to make everything work. Because that is who I am. I am a fighter. I am an ALPHA FEMALE BAD ASS, dammit!
Along with the 2 bucks, which I absolutely put toward an ice cream cone, my Dad also sent this quote which is never far from my mind when I'm struggling with life:
"Attacking is the only secret. Dare, and the world always yields; or, if it beats you down sometimes, dare it again, and it will succumb." - William Makepeace Thackeray
